Here is a completely accurate reenactment of how this all shook out: Man on the ground lacing into one of donkey's penetrable orifices. Cops arrive to the scene, likely in shock. Officer: "Sir, are you aware that fucking this donkey is illegal?" Man: "Whoa whoa whoa, I'm fucking a donkey? (looks down to see what his cock is currently inside of) Oh my god, I'M FUCKING A DONKEY! I don't know how this could have happened." Officer: "What do you mean, sir?" Man: "Well, when I left the club, this donkey was a hooker. I swear. I paid her $20. I have no idea how she turned into a donkey!"
Sunday Moyo, 28, from Mandava township in Zvishavane, was charged with bestiality on Monday. Zvishavane magistrate Mildred Matuvi heard how Moyo was found by police officers on routine patrol performing a sex act on the animal inside his yard just after 4AM last Sunday.
The donkey, which had been tied by the neck to a tree, was lying on the ground. Although he was not formally asked to enter a plea, Moyo admitted committing the crime but told the magistrate an enthralling tale which had the court in stitches.
“Your worship, I only came to know that I was being intimate with a donkey when I got arrested,” he began. “I had hired a prostitute and paid US$20 for the service at Down Town night club and I don’t know how she then became a donkey.”
The magistrate remanded Moyo in custody to October 27 and also ordered that he be examined by two government psychiatrists.
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